Sponge bath it is.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
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