Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize