Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
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all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
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