I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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