i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
i out mim tonsoeep
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