oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Randomize
