You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
