I must be too annoying 4 u.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
