What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
We're too hungover to prance.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
