i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
