she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
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