Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
