Texts From Last Night

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  (410): View more from Maryland

  i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'

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  (410): i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary' http://tfl.nu/vbb1
  Replies (15) Good night (607) Bad night (2576)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Genius.

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  (704): I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty. (803): Genius. http://tfl.nu/hci7
  Replies (25) Good night (3678) Bad night (554)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.

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  (850): He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person. http://tfl.nu/yofm
  Replies (13) Good night (701) Bad night (4221)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home

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  (910): my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home http://tfl.nu/9si8
  Replies (17) Good night (889) Bad night (3754)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?

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  (407): just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic? http://tfl.nu/xncy
  Replies (72) Good night (7966) Bad night (1464)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.

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  (828): That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy. http://tfl.nu/c9sd
  Replies (18) Good night (4613) Bad night (1091)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?

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  (802): Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok? http://tfl.nu/nera
  Replies (19) Good night (4428) Bad night (854)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light

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  (862): That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light http://tfl.nu/4kbw
  Replies (6) Good night (799) Bad night (2580)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.

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  (406): i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned. http://tfl.nu/dk6w
  Replies (18) Good night (2852) Bad night (1828)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.

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  (954): She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating. http://tfl.nu/jmu1
  Replies (4) Good night (3103) Bad night (648)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.

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  (720): I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo. http://tfl.nu/cdzc
  Replies (17) Good night (1349) Bad night (554)
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  (858): View more from California

  This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.

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  (858): This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars. http://tfl.nu/bno3
  Replies (9) Good night (1718) Bad night (511)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS

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  (262): I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS http://tfl.nu/9hqo
  Replies (2) Good night (792) Bad night (444)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?

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  (727): How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part? http://tfl.nu/hg2r
  Replies (1) Good night (994) Bad night (228)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.

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  (206): No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you. http://tfl.nu/9dg7
  Replies (2) Good night (951) Bad night (184)

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