He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Randomize
