I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
