I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize