Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
