He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize