My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
