What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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