So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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