this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
