Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
