just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
