Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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