Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
