Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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