Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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