Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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