remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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