Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
