ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
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