If i come over, it means nothing
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
