The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
