I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Randomize