The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
