Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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