Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Enjoy the penises
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
