Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
