I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
People in love make me want to vomit
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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