i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize