Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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