fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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