you guys were way drunker than both of me
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize