Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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