3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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