And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
