Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
