I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
