but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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