this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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