Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Drunk is not a location!
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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