That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
